The Gamer Syndrome

The Gamer Syndrome. This is something a friend of mine once decided i had. He classifies it as, and i quote, a "need to compete and win at everything". Now, to be honest, i agree with him to some extent. I hate losing. I think most people hate losing, just the same as me. However, there are many types of loss and everyone handles them differently.

I can mostly define two kinds of losing. By the way, when i mean losing, it's not necessarily on a computer game. You can lose at life, either on your job, at school, love, etc. But back on topic, 2 kinds of losing:

• Losing when you did everything you could. You tried your best at the new job, you studied the hardest you could, you tried to carry your DOTA team to victory. Still, it wasn't enough. Something out of your control didn't let you succeed. There is an upside and a downside to this situation. On one hand, that means you're not good enough to do something and that there's not much you can do change that. On the other, it means it wasn't your fault that you failed. My response to these kinds of "losing" is... Well, shit happens. Maybe try next time and I will do better. It makes me sad, but heck, i don't feel guilty and i realize that i, as well as everyone else, have limitations and can't obviously win at everything.
• Losing when it's your fault. This one is the worst. After many years of raging with my friends during online games, i came to realize no one accepts this kind of loss easily. It's a natural instinct, to point blame at someone else so you don't feel responsible for what happened. Kinda like when you blame your spouse for ruining a marriage when you know you could have been a better husband or wife. This one, when you recognize it was your fault, is the worst, by far. No only are you sad you failed a test, but you're depressed that you were dumb enough to spend the previous week partying instead of studying. My advice to this is to take responsability, apologize (if need be) and learn from your mistakes. If you don't learn anything from this situation, then you're asking for something similar to happen again.

Gaming helped me a lot to gain some insight on when I was being the "not my fault" kind of asshole. It still happens, every once in a while, but i usually try to bring myself to face the consequences and take the blame. I know a few people, however, that will need some drasticly traumatic experience to realize that they have this behaviour (looking at you, Sheila Broflovski).

Moving on, the other part of the "Gamer Syndrome", is the need to compete. I admit it, i am a very competitive person. It's what drives me to do something. I like a challenge, i like facing and completing a challenge, i like to show off that i did it. It's why i've always tried to be the best at whatever i am doing. Sometimes, i need motivation (say, when i'm feeling fat and i need to exercise, but I'm not feeling the energy for it) and i watch some motivational video on YouTube.

I don't think being competitive is a bad thing, to be honest. It's bad if you can't handle defeat, but assuming you have a positive attitute on "losing", then I believe it's what makes people successful and happy. This may seem like a big logical jump, between being competitive and happy, but let me quote a scene from Se7en.

 - I just don't think I can continue to live in a place that embraces and nurtures apathy as if it was a virtue.

 - You're no different, no better.

 - I didn't say I was different or better. I'm not. Hell, I sympathize. I sympathize completely. Apathy is a solution. I mean, it's easier to lose yourself in drugs than it is to cope with life.

 - Yeah.

 - It's easier to steal what you want than it is to earn it.

 - Yeah.

 - It's easier to beat a child than it is to raise it. Hell, love costs. It takes effort and work.

So, for someone who lacks that drive to compete and win, it seems it is a lot easier to fall under the "apathy" that Morgan Freeman is describing. I'm sure I will never become a drug addict because i feel like thats giving up at life and freedom. I will never consider suicide because it's losing the race that is life. It's the drive to compete that creates successful businessman and entrepreneurs. And i think that having goals and fulfilling them is what makes you happy. Competitivism will naturally grant you objectivas and goals for your life. They don't need to be big. Small goals are part of everyone's life, and the gratification you get for accomplishing any of those goals is what i think will make someone happy during the course of their life.

That's all for today. As a final thought, consider the following. You may think, just like me, that you will not give up and that you compete and face your own mistakes. However, there are lots of things that can happen in your life that somehow make you lose hope (the loss of a loved one, or an injust situation). If faced some situation that made you feel despair, how would you come about and overcome it?

Cya next time

David